Miracles

Here's the newest and latest from Sarah. She continues to serve in Lodi, but now with a new companion, Sorella Yonk.  In this edition she feels God's love in the moonlight, compares missionary work to being an adrenaline junkie, crashes a bike, hops a fence, and witnesses God's hand in the work.

3/11/15

Sorella Yonk

I really think Sorella Yonk and I are going to get along just fine. She has a lot of energy. Sorella Gillespie and I were both low key chill and Sorella Yonk is jacked up chill. Which is cool too. She is really sweet and nice. In fact, while SG's love for me was sweet and motherly and what I needed those first two transfers, SYonk's love is like Mama Lion. The first morning with her here I was a little stressed out cause of all the bus explaining and simp and potential explaining and also it just felt weird that I wasn't living with SG and it was just...Lodi felt different. It still kind of does. But we were talking and then I kind of started crying...hehe...and then she was like, "Hey, I just want you to know, whatever you are feeling whenever is okay. Cause that's you. And I just want you to be you. And if you need to put on a song from home or make some tea, girl, you just do that. You just do you. And let me know how I can help you be you." She is unapologetically a fierce sister. And I really think it'll be great. It already is great actually. We have had so many amazing break-throughs and miracles.

Biking Accident and Gnocchi

We were biking to the R's to have a lesson with them and eat gnocchi (which was....memma. Gnocchi con basilico. It melted in my mouth.) but on the way there I had my very first sister missionary bike accident. I'm all good now. I can't kneel down without it hurting but we are good. It was raining and I wanted to move from the road to the sidewalk but my tires were wet and I'm clumsy and the tire didn't make it over the curb and I crashed into a low wall and hit my head (with my helmet!) and scraped up my knee pretty bad. I tore a hole in my leggings (grr) and was bleeding kind of a lot. But onward and upward. I was half crying cause of pain, frustration that I tore my last good pair of leggings and also was really sad that SG was leaving the next day. But we went to the R's and she patched me up and all's well that ends well. We got our gnocchi.

Miracle Days

Thursday was a miracle day. We got back to Lodi and someone just randomly helped us with Sorella Yonk's suitcases and then we talked about the restoration and she thought it was cool. Then we went finding in centro and someone said we had a light in our eyes. Then we ran into this Islamic family we have seen 3 or 4 times and they said they would come to English class and they DID! Then one of the bakery ladies from Il Fornaio came running out all decked out in her red and white checkered apron and hat and asked if we could teach her niece English. Then we had a killer lesson with the R's and the husband and the daughter were asking questions, and they NEVER talk during lessons. And the spirit was strong in that room. Probably the strongest I've felt on my mission. Sorella Yonk is a great teacher. And her Italian is good too. Then, to top it all off, the moon outside was full and white and beautiful. It was a balm to my heart that first night without SG.

Friday was also full of miracles. We taught the restoration to Veronica. The lesson was great. The spirit was there. SY is really amazing at teaching. I'm excited to learn from her this transfer. We have another lesson with her this Friday and I really think that she has the potential to be a baptism. Maybe after I leave. I think six weeks might be a little quick. But who am I to know. I've never done this before. Anyway, on the way back we were the only ones on the bus so we were talking with the bus driver and he was really sweet. And then someone else got on and SY went to talk to her and I stayed at the front and talked to this bus driver. Giovanni. He was a hoot. He was talking to me about everything from annoying Italian ragazzi (boys) to fish to America and then we talked about the bible and I told him about the Libro di Mormon and he...I don't know if I would say he had real interest, but there was at least curiosity. And that is all I could ask for. But yeah....man I am going to miss the crazy bus drivers here.

Moonlight and God's Love

And to top off Friday, the moon was bright again, but this time it was yellow and melancholy. I couldn't see it from my bed that night 'cause it was too low to the horizon but I prayed it would be out in the morning and I could see it when I woke up. I woke up at about 3 or 4 am and the moon was bright and strong out my window. I lay there and let it soak in then went back to sleep. When I woke up, it wasn't in my window anymore. Lodi has been hard. Getting a new comp has been hard. But God truly has been comforting me through the night sky. I feel His solace at nights. As soon as the sun goes down and the stars and moon come out, that is when I feel most at home. That is when I feel most loved. God is good to me. He woke me up just to nudge me to look at His moon so I could feel His love and know He is here for me. Maybe it is selfish to say this, but those have honestly been my favorite moments on my mission so far. Those moments when I feel God in my life personally. That testimony at 3 or 4 am of God's acute, fierce and intense love for me. His awareness of me in a time where I do feel more alone and strange than I have since I first came to Italy.

The next day was also good but not...well, not letter worthy I guess. But that night I prayed again that I could see the moon, and I woke up again when the moonlight was covering my bed. I realized as I lay there in the middle of the night that God loves me. I don't think that has ever really come as a shock to me, but out of the billions of people He has to worry about, He put a reminder on His iPhone to wake me up when the moon was outside my window in Lodi. How great is that? How great is He. And how happy is He when we ask for these simple ways that He can show us that He is listening to our prayers and that He loves us.

3/18/15

Looking for a Wife

We went finding and this guy... so SG and I had seen him before. Not bad looking, 30ish, Italian, well dressed. But he came up to us while we were walking around centro and was like "Sister!" and then proceeded to tell us that he is looking for a wife who lights up when she talks "Like you!" and has blonde hair (like Sorella Yonk) and...well "How old are you?" "We are nineteen" "Nineteen! Well, there's this marriage place down the street. Should we just pick a date?" Yes, Sorella Yonk got proposed to by Yanni. Good ol' Yanni. She started giggling and I was like "not helping" and said, "Actually we are sister missionaries and we just talk about Jesus for a year and a half. We don't get married here. Actually, would you like our Elders to come over and teach you?" Then he was like "No no no. You're just so belle." And I was like, Dude. You're 30. Get over us. And then he tried to bacci us and we were like, Uh not happening. It's a rule, sorry. Not sorry. And then he told us to call him "amore" and I was like "Haha. Ciao Yanni. Ci vediamo!" and Sorella Yonk and I cracked up and then we got gelato and it was alright.

Heartbreaks

Fridays man. They are the worst. So two months ago all our simps dropped us. This Friday, we were out in Crema waiting for a lesson with a miracle lady who we met on the bus. She never showed up and wouldn't answer our calls. Then halfway through realizing she stood us up, Veronica texted us and said she couldn't meet today and that she actually didn't want to see us anymore because she likes being Catholic. Our hearts just dropped. We were planning on setting a baptism date with both of these women and just like that. Square one. We have the R's who aren't progressing right now, and then all the other potentials we have found (including Andrea, the fiancé of that member) we have had to pass cause they are male. Andrea has a bap date for the 3rd of April though. :) Super happy for that. But we were really down Friday cause, like, I honestly thought Veronica was the one I was in Lodi for and then...Well, more on me and heartbreaks later.

Party Bus

We were on a bus home from Pavia from district meeting and we just started talking to all the teens on the bus 'cause why not. I was talking to 3 or 4 teenagers and SY was talking to 3 or 4 girls, and they were just asking us questions about being missionaries, America, Italy, you name it. Then, right before one of the girls got off, she said to me, "These bus rides are usually boring. We all come on and put in our earphones. But this is fun! We are all friends now! Are you taking this bus next week too?" Uh freak yeah we are. The sister missionaries bringing the party to the bus.

Niccolo, the Miracle Man

So we decided to do an English fast yesterday and also a regular food fast. We were fasting that we could find ONE person that could be ready for this message. That could progress. That we could teach and love and study and pray for and have someone to feel like, "Yeah! I'm going to get out of bed this morning cause, so and so." And so yesterday morning we went out. I had had the impression earlier that morning to do casa, but then because I'm a skeptic I was like, "Yeah, right. Casa NEVER works." But we were walking down the empty grey rainy street. And no one was out. And SY said, "What is down this road?" And I was about to say, "Nothing," but then I was like, "No, let's try it. Why not?" So we deviated from our normal centro loop. And this street we turned down, it was like basically a highway. There wasn't a person in sight. And randomly SY says, "Let's do casa here." And so we start ringing. Nothing. No interest, no answer, nothing. Then we ring the 11th button. "Hello!" in English. "Hi, I'm Sister Christensen and I'm a missionary for my church and I was--" "Arrivo, arrivo!" (Coming!) We are now confused as to which language he speaks. Sorella Yonk thought maybe he was crazy and we should run because maybe he was expecting someone else and I was like Awwww, heck no. We are seeing what this is all about. And I am so glad we stayed. He LITERALLY comes running up to us. "Si?" We proceed to tell him why we are here, "uhu," um...So when are you going to tell us you're not interested? "So we have this message and this message has brought me a lot of serenity in my life and I know it can bless you." "Cool. Come on in." What? I'm just. What? So we walk in the gate and he's a man so we can't go up if there isn't a woman in the home. We ask him how many people are in his family and he's like "Just me, my wife and my two year old daughter." Okay, so you're just a cute little miracle family. That's, ya know, just FREAKING AWESOME. We talk to him outside in the light trickling rain about the restoration and the Book of Mormon and the life to come and Joseph Smith and prophets and basically he's just like "Yeah, that makes sense." Finally we are like, well.... because we weren't really prepared to actually teach someone. Because it had never happened with casa. And so we were just like, what now? We can't go up 'cause his wife isn't home....and as I was scrambling to know what to say next he was like, "Do you have a church house?" "Yeah, in Muzza just outside of Lodi do you have a car?" "Yeah, what should I bring for communion?" "Uh, nothing it's all free." "Really? But like, can I just show up with my family?"  "Yes." I literally almost started crying at this point. We exchanged numbers and told him where the church was and we are going to try and set something up with him sometime this week before Sunday when his wife is home. We saluted the other without bacci which he thought was funny that we couldn't. We turned the corner and I just started crying. We were trying to communicate our happiness through our Italian and we were crying and laughing and in that moment I truly thought, I never want to come home. Not when you can have happiness cosi tanto...

Give Until It Hurts

...And then my heart kind of sank. Let me tell you why. Because I have had my heart broken so. many. times. Just here in Lodi. Kira and Raffele, Lucrezia and Alice, the R's, Cesare, Camilla, Veronica, Mauro, Eva, and especially Gaia. My Gaia from the train who never called. All of these people whom I put my heart out for. And because I did, it hurt so much more when they turned their back on me and what I love. I have been reading the quote Dad sent me recently,

"I ask you one thing: do not tire of giving, but do not give your leftovers. Give until it hurts, until you feel the pain."--Mother Theresa

Sarah: Don't tire of giving and don't be afraid to open your heart to pain. Our God is a God who weeps. Love, Dad

I never thought about it like this, but missionary work...it's like you're an adrenaline junkie. You stick your neck out for people and the thrill is crazy and the potential for happiness is huge. But most of the time you fall hard and break yourself. And that is what missionary work is. You are asked to love others. Not just to love, but to give your whole heart. To stick it out on the table. whole and perfect and beating. And then you wait and pray and hope in the exciting and terrifying state of vulnerability. And every time I have, my heart has just been smashed. It was pulverized with Gaia because I believed so much. With others it was bruised because I had my hand over it shielding it. And for others, I don't want to put my heart out on the table because if I do they'll wreck me and I don't know how I could recover. But with Niccolo. After I walked away from that palazzo, my mind began those creeping thoughts, "What if he never answers your calls? What if you never see him again? What if what if what if..."and my heart was literally ready to jump out of my chest. It didn't care that I had only just barely gingerly stuck the poor thing back in after the Veronica episode. It has had hardly any time to recover and in fact, really I'm still recovering from Gaia. Even though that was weeks ago. But I'm choosing to be the adrenaline junkie missionary here. My heart's all out there. And it is exciting to be this vulnerable again. It is okay to feel pain on a mission. When I feel pain, I feel that I'm doing my job, that I'm being a better disciple of Christ. Christ wept. And Dad is right, God weeps. I can too. I can give my heart to Niccolo and his family. They can kick it and smash it and never call back, but I'm choosing to believe that they are my family in Lodi. I am choosing to have faith again. Even though come six weeks I might be nursing my heart back to health again. But this is the higher way. To love fully and to feel fully and then cry fully. Bring it. Miracles don't scare me anymore.

3/25/15

Niccolo

Niccolo didn't come to church and we weren't able to meet with him or his family this week. BUT! He did text us to see if we could go out to a bar (cafe) to chill with him and his wife and some friends. I don't really get why people want to hang out with two teenage girls dressed like nuns but we couldn't anyway cause they were starting the party at 10 pm. But he contacted us, so at least that is a good sign. And we are definitely going to try and swing something this next week. Keep praying.

Great People

Wednesday night we went outside and found two great people. One is our neighbor in the same palazzo and she is like...she just gets it. She was all like "I just don't get why the pope can't get married. Doesn't marriage and family bring people closer together and closer to God?" "Why do people have to be so mean to Muslims? (Right now in Crema there is a protest against building a Mosque and...it's just sad.)They are children of God too. We are all brothers and sisters. Even if we disagree on a lot of things, there is ALWAYS common ground somewhere. Her name is Lia. We hope to meet with her sometime. She forgot her number but said she'd slip her number under our door. "Our door is on the first floor on the---" "Hahaha, I know which one it is girls. Yours is the only door with a picture of Jesus on it!" Haha, you've got a point. We are pretty easy to find.

That same night we ran into a man who was just a sweet heart. We got to talking to him and his dog and found out that his son and daughter-in-law had gotten a divorce a couple years ago and that it is still really hard on him. Sorella Yonk's parents also got a divorce when she was a teenager and she bore a powerful testimony about how even through the darkest times in her whole life, she was still able to feel peace and have support through Jesus Christ and his atonement. He started crying and said "Grazie ragazze" and waved to us. I don't think he wanted us to see him cry. I wanted to just give him a big hug. His name was Giorgio.

Thursday we met some amazing potentials in Viano and in Crema. José was sitting on a park bench and I went up to him and started talking to him. After Sorella Yonk saw that I had successfully contacted someone she came over too and we started teaching him about the restoration and the Libro di Mormon. He is from Mexico and didn't speak very good Italian. The language barrier was pretty thick but we got to bear testimony of the LdM and get his number. He asked if he could come to Lodi sometime and buy a LdM in espagnolo. We said we could do one better and bring him a free one to Crema. He was really happy about that.

Then in Viano next to the yellow church we met Pascuale like pascua! Easter! and he was so dang cute. He was about 55 and bought us some pastries (Which were SO NASTY. It was like bready stuff soaked in sour pear juice. Also it stung my throat so it may or may not have been alcoholic.) and tried to buy us some sketchy sounding drink that we weren't sure if we could partake of. It turns out Chin szang is fine and has no alcohol or nuthin. Next time. Anyway, we talked about how God is a God of miracles and how we can all look for God's hand in our life and see it every day. We texted him a few nights ago to see when we could have a lesson and he sounded flakey, but then yesterday he texted us and asked us when we'd be in Viano again. :)

Then on the way home we talked to this 50ish year old woman at the bus stop. I asked her if we had missed the bus to Lodi because we had arrived a little late and she broke into a smile and said, "No!! You cuties can wait with me!" We talked about why we were here and what we were doing and she was so sweet and we got her number. We texted her to see when we could meet again and she texted back "Lodi station, 10am, Saturday" what. the. heck. That never ever happens. Matilda is bomb.

José

Later we met with José at a bar and gave him a Spanish Libro de Mormon. He forgot his glasses and so he had me read the introduction in Spanish. I was channeling my inner Mom as I butchered the Spanish words with an Italian accent. Mamba it was rough, but he said he would read it and that he had work this Sunday but that he would come the week after. We have to pass him to the anziani 'cause he's male but I really have faith that he'll pull through. Especially since we have a ward that literally 90 percent of them speak both Spanish and Italian.

Tranquility

Saturday started out a little sad. Matilda canceled the 10am station appointment and I had a little break down. (They are getting much less frequent. And less big. I am wearing makeup again! When I feel like it!) And I was like "Wah. Why am I here?" or something along those lines. We had nothing else planned for the day (our other appointment canceled too) so we hiked up our skirts and went outside for a lovely day of finding. That day we went to centro. People were surprisingly nice and we got a lot of work done. We tried to go find the place to volunteer with nuns and stumbled upon an amazing courtyard that resembled Pemberley and then right before we were about to leave decided to go out a different way and stumbled into a tranquil atrium with cobblestone and moss and cute little living quarters and a bell tower and, I kid you not, we could hear nuns singing ancient sounding songs and chants and prayers in the little chapel in their abbey. It was raining and grey and soft music.

Casa

The next day after church we again had nothing planned so we went out to do some more good ol' finding. We walked outside our apartment and Sorella Yonk pointed to a giant huge palazzo and said, let's do that one. We are on a casa (house finding) kick ever since Niccolo. So we proceeded to make our way. We had to hop two superstrade (highways) and vagabond a little bit on the highway but we made it there eventually. And then there was a fence....but we had come all this way! Well. Up and over. IT was some...well, maybe not the most dignified but no one saw us so all's well that ends well? It won't become a habit. Don't worry. Anyway we rang all the doors in the building and nuthin. But as we were walking away we approached these two guys who were out for a walk. One was about 50 and the other about 35. We talked to them about why we were here and all that and then started talking about prayer. They were both non-practicing Catholics (like almost all of Italy) and didn't really believe in God or prayer or anything, but when we started talking about ways and experiences where prayer has really blessed our life, this sounds weird cause we were outside and whatever, but it got quieter or more peaceful or something and I think they really could feel the spirit of truth about what we were testifying. We said a prayer with them and they honestly thanked us for the lovely discussion we had. We had asked them to watch the Easter video the Church is releasing (So excited for the 28th. It's like a midnight premier over here.) And then they asked where our church was so we gave them a card with the address on it. Then one of them said that they were trying to learn English and so I gave him an English class flyer. I had then given them all three of the common hand-outs and they were laughing at that and so I said jokingly, "Volete la mia borsa?" "You want my bag?" and started giving it to them. They laughed. It felt good to make a joke to people we had a gospel conversation with. Sometimes I worry they think we aren't human. Mauro and Luca were their names.

Mona

Then we went to another HUGE palazzo. Usually they are like 3 or 4 stories and just one building. This one had 8 building and 7 floors each. We started with building 1 and worked our way over. By the time we got to building 4 it was getting dark but we were both like, just this last one. And the door was open so we could knock instead of talk through the intercom thing. We went to the top of this palazzo and all the way down people were nice and listening. But the miracle was the top floor. Mona answered the door and we started talking about Easter and the LdM and what we believe. She is 15 and literally says, "I just like learning about things, can we talk more sometime." "Uh, yeah. We can." We give her our number and ask for hers and she says "Oh, I don't have a phone." (Gah. Dagger to the stomach.) Okay, well, call us!

The next night after district meeting we went back over to that palazzo to finish the other 3 buildings. We talked on the way over, "It's too early to try Mona again, right?" "Yeah, for sure. It's only been like 20 hours since we saw her." So we walk up to the building and I was SURE that it was building 5 or that we had ended with building 3 last night or...I don't know. But I pressed the top button and was like, "Hi I'm Sister Christensen and..." "Arrivo! Arrivo!" What. the. How many times can we do casa and get that answer? I don't know. But down walks Mona. "Oh, my goodness. We are so so sorry! We thought that this was a different building! We really are sorry" "No. It's alright, I have time. So what do you believe about Adam and Eve?" She was the first person we rang that night. We rang her at 5.05pm. We walked back to our house at 7.20pm and she was the only person we talked to that night. We stood outside her building for twoand a half hours talking about so many things. I can't even write them all down. The pre-life, LdM, Joseph Smith, prayer, churches, authority, God. She threw at us every hard question including, "If God and Jesus were really with Joseph Smith for those few minutes or hours or whatever, then who was in heaven answering the prayers?" Well, by golly, I have no idea. She is a smart one. She loves the bible and she loves God. And I think she really will read the BoM. But. Here is the miracle. She said, at the end of our lengthy lesson that night, "This was perfect. After you left last night I told my mom I wanted to meet with you and she said I couldn't, ripped up the card and threw it away. I prayed that you would come again. And you did." It was not a mistake that God led us to ring her door again. Even if it was by accident and if we tried to do differently with our mental reasoning. That was a miracle. God worked through my imperfections. Mona was meant to talk to us that night. But there is a problem. Her parents don't want us meeting and she is a minor. They say she is too young and Mona's response, almost through tears was, "But I'm not too young. I'm not too young." But we have to get written permission before seeing her again. Before we knew this though, we set up an appointment with her for this Friday at the station. We decided that we would bring her a Farsi BoM and a list of scriptures. If she can't get her parents to allow it we will give her that list and tell her to read and pray like crazy until she is 19 and can legally see us when she wants. It broke my heart that night to start thinking about that list. And I am praying like crazy, and ask you all to pray like crazy for her mom, Mina and her dad to have soft hearts and realize that this is okay and she is not too young. I really don't want to leave her alone with this one, but I still know she could do it. Man. Pray hard...

He Gave Me Utterance

...As we walked away from that appointment though I was thinking of how God had really used me to get her those basic answers and that book. He gave me utterance for those two hours. I wasn't thinking about the words. And some of the scriptures that came to mind, I really don't think I've read more than once, let alone found them in my Italian bible. But...gift of tongues man. It's still real out here in the field. Especially since after we said the prayer my mind was exhausted of Italian and I literally couldn't remember the verb venire "to come." And Sorella Yonk couldn't remember sicura "You're sure?" God gave us a two hour twenty minute break and we crashed hard after. But it was so worth it.

Well, those were many, but not all of the amazing miracles I had this week. God is good.

Amore, amore,

Sorella Sarah